Romantic Friendship: Not Just a Code Word for Gay by Heather Elizabeth Peterson
And while perusing the Fan History wiki's "gen" entry, I discovered another excellent article on a similar topic, this one from a distinctively fannish viewpoint:
RECLAIMING PHILIA: or the Mis-Sexualizing of Relationships, by minisinoo
NOTE: I'm not saying that if you're a genficcer like me you'll necessarily agree with everything in these articles. But they're very interesting, and I was pleased to find people who articulate at least the basics of my own thoughts on our culture's obsession with sexual love so clearly.